Not Everyone Deserves Access to You—Let Them Prove They Belong

Let them. Let them think what they want, say what they want, act how they want. Let them misunderstand you. Let them make assumptions about who you are, about your motives, about your worth. Let them go if they want to go. Let them stay if they want to stay. You don’t have to chase, correct, convince, or control.

People will do what they want no matter how much you explain yourself, no matter how much you try to prove something, no matter how much you wish they would see you differently. If they want to believe the worst, they will. If they want to see you in a certain way, they will. You don’t have to exhaust yourself trying to fight perception. Why waste energy on someone’s illusion when the truth exists regardless of whether they see it or not?

What do you think you’ll gain by forcing someone to understand you? By holding onto people who already have one foot out the door? Why do you think it’s your job to keep people from leaving? Let them. If their loyalty is so weak that distance, misunderstanding, or a single moment of imperfection breaks it, was it ever real to begin with? If they were waiting for a reason to walk away, let them find it. Let them walk.

The people who are meant for you don’t have to be convinced. They don’t need explanations, they don’t need proof, they don’t need you to constantly remind them of who you are. They know. They see. They stay. The ones who want to misunderstand will do so no matter how much you plead your case. The ones who are looking for an excuse to leave will find it, no matter how careful you are. The ones who are not meant for you will drift away, no matter how tightly you cling.

So why are you clinging? What is it you fear will happen if you just let them go? Do you think you’ll be alone? Do you think it says something about you if they leave? Do you think your worth is measured by who chooses you? If someone walks away, let them. If someone doesn’t see you clearly, let them. If someone doubts you, let them. You’re not responsible for fixing people’s misconceptions, and you’re not responsible for keeping people who don’t want to stay.

All you are responsible for is yourself. Your peace. Your energy. Your time. And maybe it’s time you stop handing all of those things over to people who would drop them without a second thought.